Ryan Kesler Uncovers Shocking All-Star Game Bribery Conspiracy Among League Officials

Even in an all-star game, Ryan Kesler takes his assistant captaincy seriously enough to question a call. Here's Kes, mic'd up for Versus, asking referee Kevin Pollock about his decision to blow the whistle. The ref's response? "Twenty bucks for the first guy that blew an offside." Funny stuff.

Hat tip to Sean Leahy at Puck Daddy for uncovering the clip.

Daniel Sedin, Henrik Sedin, and Ryan Kesler at the Skills Competition

Courtesy of the invaluable and highly beloved CanucksHD, the dedicated Youtuber who is to blogging what the flux capacitor is to time travel, here are the Canucks-related highlights from the NHL Skills Competition. They reinforce three things we might have already known:

1. Ryan Kesler's pretty fast. But you already knew that. He can make five million dollars and a baby in the same day.
2. Daniel Sedin is mighty accurate. I know you knew that too, but did you know he was the most accurate guy in hockey? Eklund is, of course, a close second.
3. Henrik Sedin enjoys all types of passing, but his first love is the saucer pass. We've long suspected it might be an addiction. Once, at thanksgiving dinner, Daniel asked him to pass the mashed potatoes and Henrik launched a spoonful over the gravy boat, right onto his plate.

Anyway. I like these guys, I think they're good, let's keep them.

Phil Kessel Was Picked Last, Not Picked On

After much speculation about who would get picked last at the NHL All-Star Draft, Phil Kessel suffered the ignominy of being the final guy. For the concerned: he'll live. In fact, I thought the only embarrassing thing about Kessel's turn as Mr. Irrelevant was the way the NHL tried to pacify him. In an infuriating bit of babying, host James Duthie coaxed an ovation out of the audience, verbally consoled Kessel (who couldn't have cared less) and then gifted him $20,000 to a charity of his choice as well as a brand new 2011 Honda CR-Z.

Meanwhile, elsewhere, the hundreds of children picked last in schoolyards across the country that day were given nothing, save a wedgie and an insecurity complex. Come on. These are NHL players, not grade-schoolers. Picked last does not mean picked on, and this was a room full of grown men capable of making that distinction. By reaching to console Phil Kessel, the NHL turned a relatable moment into another instance of millionaire ego-stroking.

All-Star Alternate Captain Can Thank Sedins

Ryan Kesler has been named an alternate captain for the 2011 All-Star Game in Raleigh, North Carolina, as have Mike Green of the Washington Capitals, Patrick Kane of the Chicago Blackhawks, and Martin St. Louis of the Tampa Bay Lightning. Kesler and Green will join Team Staal, with Kane and St. Louis joining Team Lidstrom.

It would be nice to say that Kesler received the recognition for his stellar season as he's only two goals away from setting a career high, with 35 games left to play, but the fact that Mike Green and Patrick Kane were also named alternate captains despite having middling seasons. An argument could be made for name recognition, as Kesler and Kane were stars for Team USA in the Olympics and have adorned the covers of video games, but both Green and St. Louis were left off Team Canada and likely don't spark much recognition from the casual sports fan that the All-Star Game targets.

Instead, I think it's clear that he and the other alternates were picked not for their own star-power, but for the star-power of their teammates. Green and St. Louis are teammates with two of the biggest stars in the NHL and, with Sidney Crosby unlikely to play, the two players most likely to get picked first and second overall in the draft: Alex Ovechkin and Steven Stamkos. By placing Green and St. Louis on opposite sides, a layer of intrigue is added to the first overall pick: will they lobby for their teammate or will they want to play against them?

Kesler and Kane are the third-leading scorers on their teams. This isn't a coincidence. Ahead of Kesler are the Sedins and ahead of Kane are Patrick Sharp and Jonathan Toews. All four of those players are in the All-Star Game and are likely to be high picks. Daniel and Henrik are miles ahead of Sharp and Toews in scoring, so it will be interesting to see if Kane sets aside his animosity towards the Canucks to lobby for a Sedin ahead of his own teammates. Which of the Sedins will get picked first and will Ryan Kesler lobby for one ahead of the other? With this selection of alternate captains, these decisions just got a little bit more interesting.

Quick Hits (From Behind)

Quick Hits (From Behind) is an irregular feature on Pass it To Bulis, wherein two hockey fans chip in their thoughts on current hockey news and get assessed a five-minute major and a game misconduct.


Perhaps you've noticed the influx of Canucks-related stories on NHL.com. It'd be hard not to, especially since the team has been featured in numerous stories. Why is this? Well, it might be because the Canucks are the best team in the NHL, and deserving of the coverage; or maybe because the Canucks recently had three players named to the All-Star game; or maybe it's because the NHL (and NHL.com) offices are in New York, and it's easier to cover a team when they come to you. Hint: it's the last one. If you're too busy to navigate NHL.com, PITB's collected all the Canucks coverage for you right here:

Kesler and Sedins are All-Stars

The NHL has released the complete All-Star roster for the 2011 All-Star Game and, in a move that I'm sure is shocking to everyone, they picked the right players from the Vancouver Canucks. Both of the Sedins will play, after just Henrik was picked back in 2008. Joining Daniel and Henrik will be Ryan Kesler, whose career-year pace has not gone unnoticed. I'm very excited to see Kesler take the All-Star Game very, very seriously.

While arguments could be made for both Roberto Luongo and Alexander Edler, it's difficult to argue with the selections made. For the most part, the NHL seems to have gotten it right. It's a little baffling that Henrik Zetterberg is absent and that only one goalie was selected from the Western Conference, but with the necessity of fitting in at least one player from every team, it's understandable to see one or two notable absences. It happens every year. Having to squeeze in players from the cellar-dwelling Oilers, Leafs, Islanders, Senators, Panthers and Devils means some very good players from top teams will be absent. Except, of course, that the Islanders and Panthers, as well as the Sabres and Coyotes, will only have rookies and sophomores participating in the All-Star festivities and no players in the actual game.

Let the NHL All-Star Game Stay Meaningless, Showcase the Fun of Hockey For Once

The NHL All-Star Game could be a lot of fun, but the austere soul-searching it annually inspires seems as serious as death. Every year, pundits and demagogues come together during the dog days of hockey to opine about its vast problems and merits. They hem and they haw over its importance, it's entertainment value, and how to get fans and players to take it seriously.

But it's never going to be taken seriously. Look to your left. Any game where that can happen is not a serious game. Despite being populated with NHL hockey players, it's not an NHL hockey game. It can't be, because guys get hurt playing NHL hockey games, and nobody wants to get hurt at this thing. As a result, everybody lightens up and, if we're being realistic, we're all okay with that. An injury during the All-Star game is as meaningless and preventable as an injury during a the tug of war at a church picnic.

People tell me it's a showcase for the NHL game, but it isn't because nobody can be convinced to play their heart out, and that's what every other game is for, anyway. The All-Star Game is a Star Trek convention. Yes, all your beloved characters are there, but nobody's fighting the Borg. If you're hoping for the intensity of the final frontier, you're badly mistaken or, in some cases, completely delusional. The NHL All-Star game is a sideshow.

I'm totally okay with that. Ignore the objections of the hockey Puritans who can't handle simple frivolity, and remember that sideshows can be a lot of fun. Why are we so insistent on players taking the All-Star game so seriously? As far as I'm concerned, everybody takes real hockey games too damn seriously. It's a game. Why can't the All-Star game be a moment of levity for all involved--a way to remind the fans and the professionals that, first and foremost, hockey is just a fun thing to do? Let the game be meaningless, and find a way to highlight fun and showcase the players having it.

So here's my proposition: let the NHL pick the 40 players that go to the All-Star game and announce the rosters a month in advance. Then let the fans vote on two team captains from among these guys. I don't care if they're both from the same team, either. Let it be any two guys. Then, let those players pick a charity to play for and put $500,000 dollars on the line (or some such other figure) if their team wins. Then, before the game, get all these guys onto the ice and let the team captains select their teammates the old-school way. Call a name, give him a jersey, let the other captain pick. Then let the teams play. Minimal preparation, minimal coaching, minimal austerity; just a fun game of pick-up hockey among the best hockey players in the world.

I'd watch that, wouldn't you? I'd definitely watch the guys pick one another. If Crosby and Ovechkin were voted team captains, and Ovechkin picked Malkin? If Henrik was voted team captain and he picked somebody else instead of Daniel? If Joe Thornton got picked last? Mic some guys up. Definitely mic up the draft. Let the players banter with one another, make bargains, argue over who picks first. Let players campaign to be named a team captain for the chance to support and promote their charity. Connect them with moviemaking fans who can make good viral videos. Do it all in the name of fun.

Yes, fun. Let it be fun.